November 19, 2018

Being nice


Being nice, you try to make difficult messages easier to take. 

Being nice, you wrap all messages in coloured paper. 

You say, ”Next week”, when you really mean, ”Monday”. 

You say, “If that’s ok“, when you really mean, ”Please do this.“

You say, “Have you got that?”, when you really mean, “Have you heard the message?”, when you really-really mean, “I probably sugar coated that or completely fluffed my lines and I just want to double check that you understood the depth of my dissatisfaction even though I know I didn’t actually tell you and I’m not sure that any interested listener would have understood what I was talking about.”

You might think it’s being nice, but what you’re really doing is leaving the door open for confusion or ignorance, which guarantees the next dissatisfaction and builds resentment.

And that’s not nice, it just leaves them hanging.

Skippy strategy: Be direct.